written by Princess R. Lakshman
The Reality Of Regret
To regret is to wish that you had something other than what you have now. It is to spend the present moment wishing it was different. It is human nature to dwell on thoughts that start with ‘What-if’ or ‘I wish I had’.
Regrets can quickly turn into a default setting in the mind if you are not aware of your present moment. Your moment right now is your moment to design your life in a way that will serve your purpose. Moments spent in regret do not serve your purpose – they hold you back and before you know it, a vicious cycle of regrets becomes your default setting. You lose sight of your present moment and forget to appreciate the beauty and serenity of surrendering to ALLAH’s plans for you.
Let us transform ourselves right this moment and cultivate a mindset which replaces regret with absolute gratitude.
How To Replace Regret With Gratitude
- Praise ALMIGHTY ALLAH for all that HE has already given you. Write down a list of everything you are blessed with.
- Now, Praise ALMIGHTY ALLAH for all the lessons you have learnt from past experiences, negative and positive.
- Replace all what-if statements with “Alhumdolillah”.
- Avoid comparing your life with someone else’s. Your unique abilities and experiences make you different from the rest of the world. Focus on your soulful connection with ALLAH. Increase your own ibaadah and good deeds. Don’t worry about who is saying what and who is doing what. Focus on your deeds, your thoughts, your words.
- Daily positive affirmations. Consciously choose positive words when talking about your situation. The more you affirm your life positively, the more positive outcomes arise from situations. Refer to the examples below:
|Situation||Negative Self -Talk||Positive Affirmation|
|Money||I don’t have enough money yet.||Thank you, ALLAH, for providing me with exactly what I need precisely when I need it. Ya ALLAH, you are the only source of rizq and you know what I need and when I need it. I am so grateful for this daily abundance of rizq.|
|Marriage||It’s not going well.||Thank you, ALLAH, for my realisation that there are things that I need to reflect upon in my thoughts, words and deeds that contribute to my marriage. I am grateful for the daily realisation that I need to be accountable and responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds and be responsible for my own choices.|
|Disobedient children||What more can I do? They are so ungrateful.||Thank you, ALLAH, for making my children healthy and joyful and keeping them on the straight path. I am grateful that you help me every day to be a good role model for my children.|
|Job||I hate my job.||Thank you, ALLAH, for the realisation that my heart is not aligned with my work. I am grateful for the opportunity to learn and reflect upon exactly what my heart finds joyful. I place my trust in you that you are guiding me to that. Ya ALLAH, help me to be of service to others in all that I do in my work so that I may please you.|
|Body Image||I don’t like my body.||Thank you, ALLAH, for my healthy body which unconditionally breathes for me and allows me to accomplish righteous deeds that may please you.|
Someone wise once said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
Always remember, you are not your experiences. You are the FORCE that overcomes them.
For more inspiration, check out the YouTube Channel for Muslimah Mind Matters
Photo credit : Photo by vjapratama, canva.com